Lisa had studied countless human biology books on the subject. So much so, that she considered herself a bit of an expert. Well, as much of an expert as someone could be without any practical experience that is.She had come close on her eighteenth birthday but still, it was not close enough for her liking. Her father Homer had got drunk early in the night as usual and passed out causing considerable embarrassment to her mother Marge and herself. Marge had then spent the rest of evening making sure Homer didn’t choke on his own vomit or anything during the night. With her mum and dad not around Lisa had a bit too much too drink and become a little intoxicated herself. Well maybe a bit more than a little intoxicated, she admitted. She did let Millhouse finger her after all.The way it happened was Millhouse had tried his usual pathetic attempt to come on her but due to the lack of inhibitions, she accepted his proposition instead of her just cutting him down. Lisa had led him out into. At 8 the doorbell rang and there was Neville, he nodded his hello and walked back to the jag, I followed without a word. To my surprise Bernie was in the car, 'ah, get in' he chirped, I climbed into the back and we sped off. He leaned back to face me, 'Before you ask' he said, 'Jackie is fine, I told you to leave things to me'. 'Is she?' I said sarcastically 'and what was all that about the yoghurt?' Bernie laughed, 'Hmmm that' he said. 'Well, we have a very special night planned, with some very important guests attending, and well let's just say that they have some very specialised tastes'. 'What do you mean by that?' I was getting a bit concerned, 'what the fuck are you doing with her?' Bernie's tone got firm. 'Look she is fine, it's just that, well, she's umm, lactating that's all'. 'What! You've done what! You can't be serious!' I was dumbfounded but it all became clear. Bernie smiled, 'she's fine, and its only temporary, listen, I'm here aren't i? If there was a problem would I.
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